Wemmmmberleeeey

The magic of the FA Cup. A competition which has given me so many happy moments over the years, not with Toots obviously as my main FA Cup moment with TMUFC was seeing Bog End Ant get strung by a wasp at Leatherhead while we lost the game heavily. But I can dream of cup glory every season. On the way to Hertford while driving along the North Circular myself and Ant spotted in the distance the Wembley Arch from the middle lane on the Hangar Lane Gyratory System, rising high on the North London skyline like a giant toilet seat slowly closing on some kind of megalithic porcelain pan. Could this be our year. The Final against Manchester City on a hot day in May in front of a world wide television audience of millions...

 

                         The horrible type of online cyber bullying that I have to put up with.


Started off the FA Cup weekend with a trip to Gangrene Lane to watch Sutton Common Rovers game against Eastbourne Town for another Friday night footie fest. Meet up with those Pier Pressure chaps who kindly made up some limited edition stickers for myself and the cyber troll bastard face Bornatotter. A good set of chaps who are well worth following on Twitter etc. @TownUltras
Fame at last Dear Reader. I'm known in Eastbourne !!!!!!! and I'm still under 60

 

Fame at last

SCR winning the game the game 3-0. A good night out and an entertaining game from a neutral perspective. There are some good up and coming local clubs below us on the footballing pyramid.

Next on Saturday, it was time for the all conquering Terrors to start on the long long trip up to Wembley Way with a game against Kent Side Faversham Town. A comfortable 1-0 win in which their goalie made some fine saves although a good defensive preformance from Tooting made sure that there would be no trips to darkest Kent for a mid week replay. This also ensures my dream of being interviewed by the BBC match of the Day team on the day of the final without swearing, stuttering or soiling myself in front of Ian Wright could still come true. Again better finishing could have and should have killed the game off sooner, but a win is a win and our FA Cup journey continues. Of course I missed the only goal doing the Club Shop table thingy. We are hoping to end up in the old stewards room over at the far end of the ground once the turnstiles move. Until then look out for me shouting and yelling by the side of a scarf covered table.

 

No need to worry about missing the goal as Toots number one Vlogger Bog End Ant got it covered.

Bog End Ant - You Tube

Some more good stuff going online from those South London Is Black and White chaps going up on their blog. Please give the a follow and check out their stuff.

https://www.southlondonisblackandwhite.com/

 

 

"Another brilliantly written article by Warren" Father explained to the family

"Yes Father, Besty is very clever as well" said oldest daughter Elizabeth.

"But like Duncan's work the best" added Philip

"Better than that fucking bollocks Harry does" laughed Mother.

 

Next up was a trip down to visit the team who have become are biggest rivals according to the Victor Meldrew review of the season twitter and web site......... Chipstead..... Yes, those bastards

Bank Holidays often fall on various religious and pagan festivals so the locals may well have started the day by stripping down to their underpants and chasing a lard covered pig around the town square before watching the town elder throw a donkey off the church roof before heading over for the visit of The Mighty Terrors. One of Chipsteads staff mentioned that Tooting bring a good away support, most of whom seem a bit nutty... What could he possibly mean....

 

 

                                                         Local Team for Local People

 

Yet again The Terrors away following seeming to make up a large percentage of the Bank Holiday crowd. I bet a few of locals had wished they'd stayed at home and washed the lard off as Toots took the lead after a defensive mistake by Chipstead let Danny Bassett score an easy tap in. Being the true sportsmen we are we let them get back into the game after letting them score a free header from a free-kick. Toots scored the winning goal when another free-kick from Daryl Coleman twisted into the back off the net sending the travelling Toots into raptures.
Games against Chippy Town often get a bit spicey and Omari Hibbert got shown a harsh red card later on in the game after he was fouled, the Chipstead player only getting a yellow. A very hot afternoon which must of been hard to play in. Glad the ground has plenty of cover and shade for the snowflake fans like me. So another victory which leaves us second on goal difference. Yes still early days but things are looking good. 

I'm happy, Ant is happy and Mrs H is happy because we are happy. What a great way to spend a Bank Holiday Weekend. Come and join us on the Bog End, this could very well be the start of something special....

 

Just seen the draw for the next round of the FA Cup where we play AFC Vardenians who come from Brighton despite sounding like Dr Who villains from the 7th moon of Uranus.

 

                           "We've drawn Tooting and Mitcham in the next round, Make sure you

                                             iron my best Stone Island jumper you mug"

 

 

Wemmmmberleeeey !!!!!! 

Up The Stripes !!!

The magic of the Cup

I love the FA Cup, my days following the "Glorious Gooner Gunners" meant I've seen many great games and finals but since giving up the sky premiership circus my love affair with this fantastic competition has however not been as exciting and fun filled. Far from it in fact.  Tooting and Mitcham have quite a good record in the FA Cup but of course I've missed all that. The cup run in 1959 and the defeat by Nottingham Forest is still sung about on the Bog End terraces despite the fact that most who stand on there weren't born then. A couple of runs in the 70's and which lead to games against Swindon and Crystal Palace and Bradford are still talked about by older Terrors as great moments in the clubs history. The game in the 1st Round in 2005 an away tie against Stockport was a well attended game by a large group of drunken South Londoners who saw the club loose 5-0. But it's not all about victorious games and celebrating winning trophies when following a club like Tooting and Mitcham, if we wanted victories and a packed trophy cabinet we'd all go and watch Crystal Palace.

 

But as my time following the Terrors only stretches back about 12 years my memories of FA Cup glory are very limited. A game in 2013 at Leatherhead which as per normal ended in defeat which sticks forever in my mind for their goalie getting his shorts pulled down by a couple of herberts with the travelling bogend when he was about to take a goal kick. The following week in a league game there we lost 5-1 and In the second half Bogend Ant got stung by a wasp which caused quite a scene and yet again made me question my decision to take the poor little sod to games.... especially ones in Leatherhead. They had also beaten us in the FA Cup the year before... and in the league which we both attended.  I've never seen TMUFC beat Leatherhead which makes them one of the 73 boogie teams the Terrors currently have at the moment. Leatherhead along with Berlin have had a wall that fell down in resent history and helped changed the course of events afterwards. Ask any Dulwich fan for an explanation if you get the chance.

Then the season after there was a very small FA Cup run that took us to "Mighty" Bishops Stortford after a last minute winner took us past Cray Wanderers. We dominated the game getting a draw before beating them at Imperial Fields. memorable for some of The Bishop supporters who turned up, called us minnows and refused to buy programmes and entre the "golden goals competition"etc. so as not to give any money what so ever to TMUFC and acted like total smug bell ends in the knowledge that they were a "bigger" club. Their manager was also a lovely smug prick of a man who got sacked shortly afterwards. Some victories are made even better when the opponents fans are class A twats. Of course we lost to East Thurrock in the next round but both the Stortford games were special. Now I'm not saying all Bishop Stortford fans are wankers, just the ones I've met and the ones I've spoken to.

Bog End Ant, Leader of the Tooty Wooty Boot Boys taking total liberties over at Bishops Stortford


Nothing else springs to mind since then apart from various other defeats the in worlds greatest cup competition.... But maybe this could be the year. A great crowd of over 300 turned up on a wet and windy Friday night to watch us beat Horley Town, A game moved to Friday due to the Pink and Blue Squatters having a "Home" league game on the Saturday which out ranked the FA Cup for some reason... But in truth the Friday night thing worked, of course the victory helped but the bigger than expected crowd and the packed bar meant that the Bank Holiday weekend started with a bang and an awful lot to drink for many. We were "Blessed" with a couple of Sutton United Supporters including the world famous musical sex machine @bornatotter who knows a lot about the magic of the FA Cup and the magic of FA Cup songs. All of us wait with baited breath to see who Sutton get when they enter the FA Cup this season, while he stares at his guitar dreaming of Pop Stardom and the chance to get on Football Focus again as the comedy time filling bit at the end. We'll I'm hopping to get either Spurs or Man United in the next round... We'll probably end up with bloody Leatherhead again... Let hope it pisses down with rain.....